yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
should my penis look like a turkey
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
