We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
