I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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