She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
