that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Holy shit dude........stairs
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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