i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize