i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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