did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
