Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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