I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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