Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.

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(408): View more from California

Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?

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(817): View more from Texas

He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.

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(630): View more from Illinois

230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap

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(692): View more from

I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger

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(870): View more from Arkansas

He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number

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(519): View more from Ontario

Gay?

(226): View more from Ontario

German.

(519): View more from Ontario

Pity.

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(810): View more from Michigan

Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?

(810): View more from Michigan

Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.

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