you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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