If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize