Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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