but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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