just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize
