Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
