Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
