haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Randomize
