His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
