Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize