you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Best friends brother. Beat that.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
