i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
