i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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