that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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