dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Randomize
