My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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