when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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