I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
