So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
