exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
