I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Found your dick twin last night
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Randomize