He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
