Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
