I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
