hotel room ftw
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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