Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
