I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
