i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
