Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i think i have herpe
just one?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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