"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
