who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
