Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Randomize
