I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
