You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
