I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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