can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Randomize
