I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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