had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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