lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
